mayfair

He txt me in the morning. You awake yet? You looked tired yesterday. At least you won't have to use your spin machine so much now that you are dancing every night. I'm  asleep I said, what day is it? We're still on Saturday, it is actuall Monday now. I have a show tonight then, I said.

Tony Veitch killed his girlfriend, he said. Who is Tony Veitch? The sports journalist who kicked his girlfriend in the back when they were having a domestic, he said. Google it. Next week at this time on Newstalk ZB, Paul Holmes is bringing in a plate of scones for Tony who denies being there and kicking his girlfriend. He says I did it. It might just have easily been Tony Bennett or John Foster. And did you? I have an alabai, he said. Actually anyway I didn't kick his wife I kicked Mathew Ridge, but it looked like his wife's body, and she received the bruise. How do you know it was this Mathew Ridge, I asked him? It is my job to know, he said. Anyway I was coming in from outer space, so I didn't have a choice about what I looked like. I kicked him because he was pretending to be someone he wasn't and he was laughing at me as though it was a big joke.

Well the way I see it, he said, if Veitch isn't man enough to stand up, his girlfriend is going to end up pregnant to a man he doesn't know, and the child is going to be in danger from a paedophile every time he leaves the house. That makes him guilty in my book. Heavy stuff, I said. yes I take children's security very seriusly, he said. They are pretty helpless if their parents don't take a responsible attitude. They have precious minds which can be easily ruined by horrible experiences.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W25kNrwSc0k

Found the Poker Face video from the 5th May, he said. What di you think, I asked. I was singing  along, he said, did you hear me, I was loud enough? no baby I said I don't hear nuttin up there on stage. it sounded good, he said. That's high praise from me.

Edge of Glory

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=sDPJ-o1leAw&feature=youtube_gdata_player

 Oh bad news gaga, he tweeted me. What this I ask all shocked? About you and Justin Bieber, he say. Me and the beeb, I say, what bout us? You are officially "in a relationship" on facebook, and just a day after I owwered to get engaged, he say. It wasn't me I telling him. No it is someone called Sainly Germanotta who is using you face and telling me it is her photo, and now she saying there is no Gaga, but she and some guy callin himself Justin is in love with her. That's a terrible thing to do I say. So I have issued a trespass notice against her, he say, not you but  the one saying she is Lady Gaga.

Just one thing, you are going to find it increasingly difficult to get access to your Lady Gaga body. You are going to revert to your previous body shape, the ones I know about. You were meant for me, and like Victoria's Sera, you are not going to belong to anybody else. Eventually, Caroline,  you will be a calf, a cow and finally a hunk of steak, as you appear to think I am. Nobody double crosses Ghengis Khan, and there is a predictable train of events, as you will find out. I hope you have lots of lovely baby gagas one day. Don't worry, he said, you will still get the $2 million a show I promised you, only I doubt now that you are going to help me at all with Guardian Trust. There are other options if you won't help me. I'm probably going to have to sell my ticket to your show because Guardian Trust has refused to let me have any more money, or to sue anybody for debt.

 http://www.terrysdiary.com/

 Drop dead after last Hong Kong. You Chinese kids are fucking crazy, in my dressing room recovering. Thanks Donatella X http://pic.twitter.com/OtZb2BcI

 Whitney Houston missed out on a lot, he said, we were to be partners in Pratt and Whitney jet engines. I still own the rights to the Martin-Baker ejection seats, but although I own a lot of airframe designs, the seat is the only part with my name on it.