mayfair

He txt me early. I herd you on radio just now, he say. Okay, what's your game, I ask him. You don't sound happy to see me, he said. No, I am I confessed. Ok how about a game of monopoly, but you'll have to let me. No I don't want to, I said. It won't take long. You'll have to let me be banker. What was the song, I asked him? How about kiwifruit flavoured milk, he ask me. it will be green, but it will sell if we call it organic Gaga in a bottle. No, I don't drink milk, I said. Okay, it was close to the edge he say.. Yes, I ask?  Yes what, he ask? Yes please, he say? No I say,  Close to the edge is Yes. My song is "I'm on the Edge". Of what, he ask? Are you in the Tip Top edge, or just on an edge half way up? I'm at the top of the hoist, pumping my brakes, I said. Still, he asked? Metaphorically, I said. No, I meant, keep still and you won't fall off, he said. Come on up, I said. No I can't he replied. There's no ladder. Use a tennis ladder, I said. No thanks, he said. There's no edge either. Mum told me to stay here, and listen, I said. And did you hear anything, he asked? Just a guy talking to dad, I said. What did he say, he asked? A lot of threats, but I'm not telling you, I said. Your mum just wants to keep you safe from me, he said. You should get married. Then you can retire. I'm getting married, I said, I  have a boyfriend. I don't like him, he said. You haven't met him, I said. I love him. You love me, he said. There's nobody else who loves you the way I do. What about my mum, I said? What about her, he asked? She loves me. She's already married, he said. She created the perfect child, and now she wants you for herself. No man will be good enough, not even me. You won't want me once you have me, I said. That's a chance you will have to take, he said. You will always be free to leave me if you want somebody else. And you'll look after me, I asked? Whatever it takes, he said. You'll get a job? I wouldn't go that far, I said. How will you support me then? You have enough millions to support us both, he said. I'm not expensive, just 12 cats, some nice clothes, a new car, and a bit of work on the house. What sort of work, I asked. A studio so I can paint without dust getting all over everything, he said. Clean up, I said. Have you heard of a vacuum cleaner? I went to boarding school, didn't I he asked. No I don't have time for it. By the way, he added, the song is called Edge of Glory. I know, I said, I wrote it, I was testing you. No, I was testing you, he said.

There have been ructions on your web site today, he told me. Which one, I asked him. I was worried. Tell you later he said, Vany Germanotta is thinking about deleting Lady Gaga  https://www.facebook.com /permalink.php?story_fbid=173951872726103&id=100003338758316

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Let's play monopoly first, he said. Okay, I said, lets have the money. No he said, you don't get any until you pass go. What about properties, then I asked? It is all on my web site, he said www.rainierbank.biz, but you need a web browser, so I'll give you one. You already mentioned it once or twice, I said. I thought you weren't listening he said. did I say I was giving you a browser before? No. No a browser costs £100 and is shareware, so you pay another £100 every month until you buy it. Let's just play the game I said, I want this to be over. Would you rather play snap, he asked? It could be more your thing. No, I'm fine, I said.

You got to find a school, he said, and get all the kids to collect their cans. We don't have cans I told him. I mean aluminium cans, he said. The world price is £2 per kilogram. I'm promising to pay 10c per can if it is squashed flat. Then each class has a competition to see how many they can collect in a week, and the winner gets an extra prize for the class to share. Is that all, I asked? More, or less, he said. If there is something else, I'll let you know. No, I don't want to play, I said. Why not, he asked? Kids will love it. I may even give them an extra 5c each for their efforts.

And how do they collect $200, I asked. They can buy any property once they have saved enough money, he said. For instance, they can all decide, as a class, to save $2 or $10 a week. Once they have $60, they can buy Whitechapel, and then they deposit the money with me. After 12 months they get double their money back. For free, I asked, what is the point of that? The point is children recycling rubbish, and making a competition out of it, he said. So they don't throw dice, I asked.=? As Einstein said, he said, "I don't believe God throws dice." Therefore everybody earns their money by doing useful work. No I still don't want to play, I said. You can afford it, he said. No, I said, we already had a vote on it at the Board of Trustees meeting at our school, and we don't want it. But I wanted to make a presentation to them, he protested. Too bad, I said. We like things the way they are. Our kids recycle into a bin. And how much does the school get, he asked? $70, I told  him, per bin. How much per kilogram is that, he asked, because the prices of gold, aluminium and copper are rising. If you store it for a while it will be worh more. At present they should pay you $4 per kilogram. I don't know, I said. Please don't come back to our school. Is that your final word, he asked, because there are other schools. If that is your attitude, you'll be banned from my church also. Fine with me I said, there are other churches. I'd like you to name one he said. Fine. Hey, he said, you don't need to be antagonistic toward me. If you have problems, let me help sort them out. What's your problem, I asked him? I'm impatient to get important things done, and you are in a position to help me out. I'll still get them domne, either with or without your help. You're mistaking me for someone else, I told him. Who is that, he asked? See you later, I said

See you were in Chicago last night, he said. Oh yeah, I said. Looking particularly attractive, he added. Flatterer, I told him. No I've never given a compliment to any other woman, he said. Why do I believe you, I admitted. There is a shell a mile thick around me, he said. You'll nevr even break half way through if you took ten lifetimes. Unfortunately we don't have ten, we have ten years. How do you know, I asked him? Why do you think I'm telling you these things, he asked? No idea. These are things I wouldn't say in person, he said. It would be too boring and pompous. You're coming across as quite full of yourself, I told him. My couin is a High Court Judge, he said. You have to be when you are that important. Really. Truly. You have a mother, he asked? Of course, I replied. It wasn't a question, he said. My mother is dead, yet she has been born again, I have seen her, I said. And? Her mother isn't the queen, like this time he told me. I see, I said. No, and I know I will not be her son, he said. Or, I will be, but I have already lived  that life. After I die, I shall have a different life, a mystery, but probably not on this planet, you will stay here. Are you sure, I asked him? Not about your life, he admitted. But whatever it is you will not be as great as me, unless you stay with me. I don't know whether you wrote your songs for me or not, but as they say the proof of the pudding will be in the eating.

Who's in the photo, I asked? This is Eve, the first woman, Xxxxx, my Serbian friend of five years ago, he said. I'm Adam. She looks nice, I told him. She's very tough, and very smart, he said. She looks a bit the worse for wear, I said, she's just been badly beaten up, and come June she's due for two  more beatings. This year, I asked? No 2006, he said, it's alright. She was going to come and visit me five years ago, but I couldn't get permission from my trust. I see, I said. This is the one your mother called the "whore", he told me. She was raped twice, by her boss and a man who calls himself a friend of mine and a friend of Jesus, John Foster who lives in Olympia Washington, and owns a radio station there. If you know this, why don't you do something about it, I asked him? There is nothing I can do, he said. John denies it was him, he blames his friend. When he comes to his senses he will go to the police himself, and tell them he's a rapist, and wants to go to prison. I've already told my friends in teh Shaolin Temple, and they will catch him, and find out the truth for themselves. God wouldn't tell me this if it weren't true. How do you know God told you, I asked? Maybe you don't believe in God yet, he told me, but when you do you will know who I am. You will remember me from our past lives together, and then you will know that I love you.

Youu happy then, I asked him? All the last 2,000 years I knew only one thing, and looked forwrd to meeting one person, apart from my mother, who I'd even forgotten what she looked like, the queen. turns out she doesn't care about me at all. She has too many personalities, too many other husbands, so I've written her a letter, since she won't write to me. I asked Camilla, Duchess of Cornwall if she would do something for me, but I haven't heard from her yet, so I don't know where her loyalty lies. It must be with Charles, I suppose. He must be a much nicer person than he appears in public, and I don't know why Diana divorced him. You are in a fantasy of knowing these people aren't you, I said. Ive also written to the Archbishop of Canterbury, Desmond Tutu and I used to correspond, Creflo Dollar Jr, and Boris Johnson among others such  as ministers of our government.  Okay, he admitted, they are not real letters, more like impressionist paintings, but you have to understand something. What's that. I asked?

There was a time, when I was born in China, and was growing up in a poor rural family. There was a girl, who was my sweetheart, even though she was only about six and plump, and I was about eight. But I was bright, and my family ecided to send me away to school, which meant Japan. I had all sorts of pickles and things with me, and had two years to learn the language to an excellent standard, and pass my exams to work for the government. It was very hard work, but I passed with distinction, and worked for the government, but it was a very academic career. I never did go home, or marry that girl. As the song says, with one foot on the platform, and one foot on the train, I was torn between family, and academia. I couldn't stop. My academic record in China in many other lives speaks for itself. It is incorporated in the  language, which I practically invented, and you see the difference between the spoken languages of China, and the written one. You see a broken back. You see lots of things if you are an academic, and now women can be university professors, anything. One time, I was working in China, and they wanted me to work in the fields, like ordinary people. I left. I went to Japan. There is no way I can become a common labourer. I have a job to do, and other people less qualified can do the field work. There is no point in trying to break me, as I will not bend down. I can't understand, it, I said. China has a long history, he said. Look at the wors SUN, at the top of this page. It says Sun Corporation. It is the Chinese armed forces, in one word. It is a big word because there are over ten navies, outside this galaxy, some of them, all completely real, and a lot of plants and animals I created. Everything on this planet. It is a very big, majestic creation, but it will not fit into a small box. I see, I said, but I was feeling very sad for him. Now we have my new creation, radio and computers. It is at a fragile stage, but I'm fairly confident we can solve the problems, working together.