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    The  Journal

of Crime & Punishment  page 1

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Page 4


This is not a competition, it is a private page

My photo essay.

When I was young, I used to be so cute. Everybody, except the boys thought so.

Then, one day a met a boy who felt the same way that I did. Well actually it was dad, lets be frank. He taught me that winning isn't everything.

No, actually it wan't him. While I do appreciate all those hours he put in washing dishes and cleaning toilets, he can be a bit of a bastard sometimes, especially the way he treated mum, leaving her at home while he took me on a trip to Florida. Actually I say always I hate it, but I love Florida. It is so warm compared to Russia, and the beaches. Everyone says have a nice day, and I always say "don't mention it". I was secretly hoping to meet Ross, out of Friends, but someone told me, no, he lives in New York. Well Duh? That is just a television show, and he doesn't work in a university teaching. Who doesn't know that? 

One day I was in a restaurant having this breakfast and a kiwi walked in. We didn't talk, but I think he quite cute and I think he recognised me, even though I was wearing a hoodie which covered most of my face. Later he contacted me, and told me he'd inherited a patent for rubber, and had the biggest balls factory in the world. Who did he think I was? I already knew that. He must be Charles Goodyear you, know. But it got better, he wanted to go into partnership with me.

 Dad taught me everything I know about tennis, and that not winning can be good for you.


 I'm sure all the other girls are going to be devistated and not want to talk to me.

Unfortunately, he told me there was a condition, if I knew what he meant. Well I know what the word condition means. He was probably going to ask me to marry him.

I was seriously thinking about it even though everyone thinks I'm gay..

But then he said, there was more.

What I said?

He also said he is owner of Monarch brand, and Admiral brand.

Did that mean he wanted me to have butterflies at the wedding? .

No, he said since he was the only one legally allowed to make tennis raquets, he wanted me to organise a public announcement at the end of the season and tell everyone that tennis is finished, we now own the game of tennis, and this court.

I told him I'd have to speak to Serena about it, because she's my best friend and has been giving me lessons and advice about the game.

He said no, don't talk to her because he knows what a bitch she is and only wants to win for herself. Stop trying to help the other players, and look after yourself. Don't give all your money to charity, she never does. And then he told me some of the things he's heard about the way she treats Venus. I think he thinks Venus is lovely and gentle, and Serena only wants to be better than her. He was very bitter and kept calling her "that bitch Serena".

Is that all you want I said, just a public announcement? That's what the tennis public want he said, I want something else. I was wracking my brains, but I couldn't think of anything that guys want, but I don't know too many.

Serena on the other hand was very enthusiastic. She was prepared to anything. I asked. What was it that he wanted. He just smiled. I can't tell you. next


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